Weirdiknow

I do my best to not be inspired by anyone I know. I'll only let complete strangers & whims produce creativeness. One of those days.

New Blog

Hey hey all!

I have a new blog that is currently under construction. You can get a taste and PREVIEW of what it's like by clicking on that link, but I am still working on the format and more posts as we speak.

No, I am not abandoning this lovely blog, but I have a particular ambition with this new one that I will be focusing most of my time on.

Love always,
Jaclyn

Marriage

I have made a sacred covenant with Ryan Patrick Hoselton. It's something worthy of muse. I have musings; I'll share them soon.

I know what you're thinking...

I get engaged and I forget all about you. It's okay blog, I still love you and we will catch up soon.

Xoxo,
Jaclyn

Albert Einstien, William Faulkner, & Paul Tripp

As previously posted, I shall explain the title and subtitle of this blog.

This sentence might be familiar to you, Albert Einstein is quoted as saying, "I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." When I first read this, two thoughts crossed my mind. First, did Einstein really say this and is it recorded in a book? Naturally, I  looked up the quote and found that there is no legitimate source that cites these words ever actually crossed his lips. (A website that calls itself Quote World can't be too creditable, right?)

But secondly, whether he did or not, whoever came up with this sentence hit a concept that speaks to me. The combination of curiosity and passion thrust together is extremely inspiring to me. I desire to be a life long learner and in continuing this blog, I hope to use it to log the results of my curiosity.

Recently I've run across another quote that appears to be a bit more credible. It is taken from the speech William Faulkner gave after receiving the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1950. He said,

"...the young man or woman writing today has forgotten the problems of the human heart in conflict with itself which alone can make good writing because only that is worth writing about, worth the agony and the sweat. He must learn them again. He must teach himself that the basest of all things is to be afraid: and, teaching himself that, forget it forever, leaving no room in his workshop for anything but the old verities and truths of the heart, the universal truths lacking which any story is ephemeral and doomed — love and honor and pity and pride and compassion and sacrifice. Until he does so, he labors under a curse. He writes not of love but of lust, of defeats in which nobody loses anything of value, of victories without hope and, worst of all, without pity or compassion. His griefs grieve on no universal bones, leaving no scars. He writes not of the heart but of the glands."

Even if I don't agree entirely with Faulkner's ideology, this immediately, deeply, resonated with me because I desire from my soul, to muse and understand what is universally true. Not only does this extend to what I believe about religion and eternity, but also the sort of conversation and the sort of literature that moves me from the very depth of my being. I want this blog to include musings that have significance over the universe and across generations. I want to consider the question of : why is this universally true? According what authority?

A few months ago I was reading Paul Tripp's Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands and I wrote this post sharing what I have learned from Tripp so far:

"Human beings were created to be interpreters. We don't just respond to the facts and experiences of our lives, but we respond to our interpretations of those facts. This is why it is very important to make sure our interpretations are always filtered through scripture. If our interpretations are not biblical, then our responses will not be biblical either. Keep guard."

Thus, I included the phrase "life impressions" in the subtitle because I would like to make sure the readers are pointed to the fact that these posts are merely interpretations through my lenses of life. Although not all interpretations are universally true, we all do see life through a certain worldview and I think it is important to try to understand our worldview in an unbiased manner.

I hope that you will enjoy this blog and please feel welcomed to comment--I would love to hear your thoughts!

Live Provocatively

Although this isn't my latest read, my thoughts wandered to a journal entry I made on 04/30/12 and I want to record it on my blog as well.

Points I received from reading Mark Dever's The Gospel and Personal Evangelism book:

To the Church, Beloved,

• Learn to ask good questions in order to provoke self-reflection.
• Question the orgin of life, how one understands the "bad things" in this world, thoughts on death, Jesus, God, judgement, etc.
• Listen AND make suggestions on what you believe is the case.
• Be provocative in your conversation.
• Live in a distinctly salty way--through words and actions. Make others thirsty. Make your whole life before others provocative.
• The message that you are sharing is not merely an opinion--but a fact!
• Islam has a shallow understanding of man's problems because it teaches that our problems are basically a matter of behavior, that the solution to our problem is merely a question of the will.
• We [Christians] don't think that our real problem can be dealt with by political power. I could put a sword to a person's throat and make him a sufficiently good Muslim, but I can't make anyone a Christian that way.

A Mother as Artist

"Just as an artist who paints pictures and portraits exercises great care in his work, so each of you, mothers and fathers, must be attentive to these wonderful images [children]. Each day, a painter adds what is necessary to the picture. Sculptors do the same, removing excess stone and adding what is lacking. You should do the same: as makers of images, devote all your time to the task of fashioning wonderful images for God. Remove the excess; add what is lacking. Each day, examine the images closely. Cultivate the natural excellence that each one has, removing what is by nature inferior….[T]each them to be sober, vigilant, watchful in prayer, and to place everything that is said and done under the sign of the cross."

-John Chrysostom, On Vainglory and the Education of Children

Cited from: http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/a-mother-as-artist

Pitch hurs

Trip to Cali

Ryan and I took a lovely little vaca to Cali last week. For the first time in one year and three months, I actually questioned why I would leave such a hip state for Kentucky. However whenever such a doubt would arise, I'd look at my travel partner and realize that even my life decisions were bigger than me, and out of my control.

An interesting phenomenon

It's an interesting phenomenon that heads turn immediately to find the sound of bursting laughter. There is hardly a sound more beautiful.

eBooks

It occurred to me today that eBooks and Kindles disgust me because they have no integrity.

Real books have integrity. eBooks are shallow ghosts that will never encompass the organic joy of what reading a book fully means.

Kiss the wave

"I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me against the Rock of Ages."

-Charles Spurgeon

I am still learning.

It hit me like a semi

I've finally come to accept it. You must have the mundane if you want to have the exciting.

If everything is spontaneous and great then nothing is. So I'll work these slow paced work weeks, spice them up as much as possible and look forward to the exciting.

Is that how it goes?

Jay Gatz

I read this book, with this guy, this weekend.

Splendidly spectacular.

How are you doing?

It is interesting to observe the variety of responses one will get from asking the question, "How are you doing?"

Some reply, as a reflex, "I'm fine, how are you?"
Some proceed to fill you in with the details of their day as if what they do is connected to how they are doing. 
Some give a vague answer like, "Oh, you know, life is crazy but things are good."
Some will undergo to actually ponder the question and give you an honest response.

What does the question mean, anyways? What kind of answer are you looking for when you ask it? Is it merely a greeting?

I think it's important to challenge people to really think about how they are doing and wait for them to give you an honest, thought-out answer. Dig deep.

My journal

My journal and I often have dialog about what is on my mind.

I anticipate some productive blog updates to post soon.

Don't fight it

Believer:
Upon facing difficult circumstances, put effort into hourly checking your heart and joyfully driving your will to act and think more like Christ.

In the end, this is God's will and intention for every circumstance: your sanctification. So don't fight it. Pain will be lessened if effort is put into conforming to the image of Christ.

1 Thessalonians 4:3
Philippians 2:12-13

Thoughts on Proverbs

"The fear of the LORD is instruction in wisdom, and humility comes before honor."
Proverbs 15:33

Implications:
Step 1: Cultivate fear of the Lord
Step 2: Make hourly choices that express my fear of the Lord

Spurgeon

"You have no place in which to pour your troubles except the ear of God. If you tell them to your friends, you but put your troubles out a moment, and they will return again. Roll your burden unto God, and you have rolled it into a great deep, out of which it will never by any possibility rise. Cast your troubles where you cast your sins; you have cast your sins into the depths of the sea, there cast your troubles also. Never keep a trouble half an hour on your own mind before you tell it to God. As soon as the trouble comes, quick, the first thing, tell it to your Father."

-Charles Spurgeon

New topics preview

New blog topics have been mulling around in my brain for weeks now. The next few days are looking busy so I will not take the time to sit down and organize each topic but rather take advantage of the caffeine racing through my body at 1am to preview what I'd like to hit... eventually. 

1. Today I finally understood Romans chapter 6. I've struggled with this passage for years and I can tell that this understanding is going to have a life changing effect on me.  I really want to write about this revelation because I think it deals with something that many Christians misunderstand.

2. Needs I think need to be met (and potentially could be met by me): biblical and logical dialog on feminism vs. femininity commenting on specific feminist writers of books and columns that I've recently read, a how-to encourage single women and an explanation of the choices they face in the Christian realm - modern day-, & who's ministering to the Pastor's wives? blog & networking resources

3. My future plans with international missions, etc. but also my understanding of what to do with plans and direction. And how God is turning everything upside down.

4. Where the new blog title and sub title came from and how it's permanent (finally) and my new ambition for this blog.

Hopefully this will stir up accountability for me to write about each idea.

Books

I've been on a strict diet of books since 2012 started. I'm trying to get through them as quickly as possible, and to read each book in a way that I "use" them. Admittedly, my reading did slow down a bit in April, but I'm picking up the pace again.

I also have a rule to only read one book at a time and I try to diversify the rotation as generously as possible. Right now I am refreshing myself on linguistics. This was one of my favorite classes in undergrad and I seemed to have a knack for it. I was even thinking to switch to a Ling major but my school did not offer it.

I am a gregarious creature

I have a vision. This is my vision: it would be lovely to spend my days in a large white kitchen with two french doors connected to my organic garden outside from which I could cook all sorts of delicious treats! I'd be there all day long cooking and baking with Julia Child and Rachmaninov (and any one else who'd like to join me) until I had way more food than I could ever deal with, so in the evenings I'd call many people over and we'd have a great feast! During this gathering there would be people discipling people, others evangelizing others, sweet fellowship and lots of fun! This would be a very eclectic and international crowd of friends and on late summer nights we'd go swimming under the stars!

To make this happen I am continuing the art of cooking/invention with Julia.

I have way more ideas and thoughts added to this snippet, dealing with discipleship, international missions, and productivity, but I will share this another time... if you're lucky.

Gabriel's Resolve-The Visit-The Mistake

"Why, Farmer Oak," she said over the top, looking at him with rounded eyes, "I never said I was going to marry you."

"Well--that is a tale!" said Oak with dismay. "To run after anybody like this, and then say you don't want him!"

-T. Hardy
Far from the Madding Crowd

What a tease.

Now-isms

"Maturity and perseverance are weakened by a 'now' mentality."

"We forget that God's primary goal is not changing our situations and relationships so that we can be happy, but changing us through our situations and relationships so that we will be holy."

-Paul Tripp
Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands

Richard Baxter on his wife

This is too beautiful not to link. Read how Richard Baxter describes his helpmate and her role in his life and ministry. Click here.

Numbers 15

37 The LORD said to Moses,
38 "Speak to the people of Israel, and tell them to make tassels on the corners of their garments throughout their generations, and to put a cord of blue on the tassel of each corner.
39 And it shall be a tassel for you to look at and remember all the commandments of the LORD, to do them, not to follow after your own heart and your own eyes, which you are inclined to whore after.
40 So you shall remember and do all my commandments, and be holy to your God.
41 I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt to be your God: I am the LORD your God."
Numbers 15

We are naturally inclined to whore after the desires of the flesh. Active, intentional steps must be taken in order to turn and remember God's holiness--remember Christ--and delight in Him alone.

Work out your salvation with fear and trembling for it is God who works in you. He is able to do far more than we ask or imagine.

Enchillada night

I made enchilladas yesterday! I had two international couples over last night before our class and I made my mom's Mexican staple. It's been so long since I've had enchilladas!

We ate beef enchilladas with red sauce smothered with sour cream, white rice flavored with lime and cilantro (so good) and a cucumber salad. :) So happy. I love having people over in general, but this especially inspired me as I was sharing with them food that I grew up eating--my culture.

Also, my two Australian friends ate their very first American chocolate chip cookie made by me! We had Mexican food followed by an American desert! How typical Jaclyn.

The underestimated gospel

And the LORD said to Moses, "Is the LORD's hand shortened? Now you shall see whether my word will come true for you or not."

Numbers 11:23

What I get from Tripp

Human beings were created to be interpreters. We don't just respond to the facts and experiences of our lives, but we respond to our interpretations of those facts.

This is why it is very important to make sure our interpretations are always filtered through scripture. If our interpretations are not biblical, then our responses will not be biblical either.

Keep guard.

Strategy.

Strategy.

Ask the right questions.

I bought the sushi

I am very confident that 99.9% of the people who read this post would agree that buying sushi from Kroger is always going to be a bad choice. Yet, it couldn't be helped. Hunger pains tore at my stomach as I considered Kroger brand sushi to a Kroger chicken salad sandwich. (While, admittedly, chicken salad sandwiches are also a questionable choice, once it is compared to Kroger sushi, chicken salad should win.)

However, all sense aside, standing at the supermarket, I WANTED the California roll--it was overwhelmingly desirable at the moment. But the heart is deceitful.

Lest I stray from my point: I chose to buy California rolls for my meager lunch even though, to the sane mind, this was a bad move. I gave in because I could only think about what I desired. I did not consider the wisdom or quality of the choice. I was hasty.

The California rolls tasted like paper and I could barely finish them.

This is a metaphor to how sin works in our lives: it blinds us and we end up choosing Kroger sushi--something that NEVER satisfies and always causes regret later.

FFTMC

Interesting muse Thomas Hardy offers in Far from the Maddening Crowd: "The rarest offerings of the purest loves are but a self-indulgence, and no generosity at all." Thoughts?

Lights on

A light bulb just sparked. (As usual as I'm drifting off to sleep.) An idea. Inspiration. Movement. Looking forward to developing this one--I think it has great potential!

More to come.

T. Hardy

"But wisdom lies in moderating mere impressions, and Gabriel endeavored to think little of this."

Wanderlust

It's not good for me to get bored. Whenever I am not stimulated or things are the same old thing I try to think of ways to add a little color and spice to life. Unfortunately since being in Louisville for a year already there is not much to work with. This is when it gets dangerous and I begin to consider getting a tattoo or cutting all my hair off to experience newness and change and excitement. But hopefully I won't fall prey to my tattoo thoughts and instead it will work out for me to switch cities again. A nice trip to Paris will do for me. I guess I'd settle with DC too...

I know that it's not good for me to be as unstable as I feel. But I have talked with some older ladies at my church about these ideas that pop into my head and they don't seem to think that there is anything wrong with these thoughts. I am young. It is time to live.

This morning was

This morning was out of the ordinary.

I shot up 15 minutes before my alarm went off, at 6:15 --wide awake. Scenes from last nights dream were still running through my head and I smiled. For the first time in years I got up without a thought of turning over under the warm covers so I hit the shower. Rachmaninov's swift fingers flew across the piano and beautifully complimented this phase of the morning. I sat next to my open window with some English Tea and a blueberry muffin, reading as the sun gently rose.

I beat the sun.

The sun is such a sleepy head.

Random thoughts

I've been learning the value of pursuing people. Most people want to be wanted and respond well when you actively do so.

I enjoy pursuing others. It makes me so happy to get to know characters from all over the world and have a chance to figure out what they are passionate about, what puts a smile on their face--I have a chance to greatly impact them by speaking Truth in love.

I GET SO EXCITED!!

But a problem occurs when I have in mind more people to get to know than I have time for. I am sad when this happens. However I suppose that this only signifies that a party is in order.

[Second] idea for the day

Every minute spent not-learning is a minute wasted.

Idea for the day

If we are struggling, it is not because of our circumstances, but because of what we allow to control our heart.

More to come.

Lessons from conversations

"Maturing in Christ is learning to run to Him quicker day by day."

-Jennifer Keisling


"You don't have to act the way you feel."

-Zane Pratt

White

The snow falls so silently.

While my thoughts rage as a sea storm.

I hear the wind

Tonight I made the batch of best scones attempted so far. Breakfast/brunch tomorrow at my place with the girls. :)

Hoy dos

Today is: mock European chocolate from a vending machine, black coffee that tastes burnt, emotional memories from yesterday, a new apartment/season, and hope that God's love is better than unconditional.

Looking forward to: some coffee shop time after work and new people joining my home group.

Reloj

Years

I've awakened to a sense of urgency.

I cannot shake this feeling that I have wasted many years of my life living without focus, intentional goals or learning, living without ambition and drive to accomplish what I've always wanted to be.

This season has definitely changed me.

Is it possible to read 100 books in one year?

I don't know. But it's worth a shot.

http://www.modernlibrary.com/top-100/100-best-novels/

The overwhelming theme of this season

INTENTIONALITY.

Lately

Evangelism, discipleship, biblical counseling, strategy, ministry mind shifts, church membership, responsibility, the value of faithfulness & commitment to people & things, dying to self & meeting the needs of others, intentionality & diligence in life goals, intentionally learning about various aspects of the world, continual intentional reading--this is a snippet list of what I have been learning & experiencing the values of these past few months.

It is so exciting to learn more and more--Praise God for teaching me!

I do realize that I used the word "intentional" many times in the above list.

(no title)

If something is not "best," does that mean that it is not good, or just not as good?

Excited

"The first step in effective time management is often to take the time to plan!"

The Wise Woman Manages Her Home

It's exciting to see what I've learned by experience in print. Even more exciting to see the fruit of such principles. Continuing to grow.

Text

I am changing. Things are different now.

The title

Titles are very important. I remember my professor stressing the value of titles in my creative writing poetry class, quite especially. During my late Sherlock Holmes readings, I've remembered how titles may actually add to the experience of a story, or help to understand it.

I was recently asked why the title of this blog is called "An Inconsolable Longing." (Although, it may well be noted that I often change the title of this blog to whatever I please.) However, as of late, this particular phrase has haunted me as I once read it in reference to an understanding of Tolkein and Lewis. Please click here to read where this came from.

I quite resonate with this "inconsolable longing" that Piper refers to.

Latest read

"Colonel Ross still wore an expression which showed the poor opinion which he had formed of my companion's ability, but I saw by the Inspector's face that his attention had been keenly aroused.

'You consider that to be important?' he asked.
'Exceedingly so.'
'Is there any other point to which you would wish to draw my attention?'
'To the curious incident of the dog in the night-time.'
'The dog did nothing in the night-time.'
'That was the curious incident,' remarked Sherlock Holmes."

I've been reading some Doyle this week. It's great fun. I always try to beat Sherlock at trying to solve the mystery, but it really is a pointless pursuit as I'll never be able to see all the clues that Sherlock paints before he explains them to me. But I did beat Watson at solving A Case of Identity today. :)

This morning-thoughts

It feels really good after having a very detailed and painfully scary nightmare to wake up in a safe apartment on my comfortable and warm couch. My heart feels happy just thinking about this. I think there is a particular pleasure in the process of being comforted after hurt.

God is my ultimate comforter. He receives pleasure and glory when I allow Him to comfort me.

Fitzgerald

"There was music from my neighbor's house through the summer nights. In his blue gardens men and girls came and went like moths among the whisperings and the champagne and the stars. At high tide in the afternoon I watched his guests diving from the tower of his raft or taking the sun on the hot sand of his beach while his two motor-boats slit the waters of the Sound, drawing aquaplanes over cataracts of foam."

Beautiful writing makes me happy. I want to be in this scene.

Optimism

"It has taught me to hope..."

These words are haunting

I need to hear this again and again

I love the book of Ruth.

What if

I had a thought. What if everyone was taught to read at least five world news articles in the morning before they began their day? This would mean that the conversation between people throughout the day would be much more well informed and decent opinions and ideas would arise from society!

I'm going to try to start doing this, but I need others to help me!

Hoy

Today was and is: a day off, a SUPERB talk with my discipler, possible big moving plans in the making, a failed attempt at making chocolate covered almonds, the best looking batch of chocolate chip cookies I've ever made, Spanish lessons for the bulk of my day, and dinner with friends.

El aeropuerto estaba fenomenal

Airports are great for entertainment. Today I had a chance to visit the airport & pick up friends of mine, but I arrived earlier than necessary because I wanted to people watch. I headed straight for Starbucks and strangely enough, there was no barista in sight so I sat on a stool to begin my entertainment. A few minutes later someone tapped me on the shoulder and I turned to find a tall, curly long-haired man, with a rugged face and indie tattoos on his forearms. "Are you waiting for a drink or just waiting?" he asked. He was loud and full of smiles. I would describe Daniel as full of life, curious, and sociable. I feel fondly towards him, but perhaps I feel fondly toward him because he gave me a free drink and had some nice words to say to me. I don't think that was it.

Since it was a slow day for this particular Starbucks, the barista and I got to talking.

The best part of my day is when Daniel pointed out something. There was an old couple walking side by side together towards security. They looked just like any normal couple until you noticed the details. They were both pulling one carry on roller bag together. Their hands shared the plastic handle, side by side, in a sweet way that expressed, we don't have to say a word. Daniel and I both admired and watched until they arrived at security. The white haired man kissed his (wife?) on the forehead as she departed. He waited until she was through security before he left the airport. It was possibly the sweetest thing I've ever seen and certainly made my day.

Daniel and I, we shared a moment in time, an experience, together. We made a memory that neither of us will ever have shared with anyone else. We discussed our mutual love of people watching, various ways people watching can teach you life lessons, funny people watching stories, and had a genuinely good conversation. It was a genuinely pleasurable hour of my time, sitting with a stranger and watching the world travel. While I was waiting for my friends.

What are moments like this derived from? Can they be intentionally made? Or do they just happen whenever the mystic forces allow them to? I'm going to think about this.


I need to sleep. Today was a rough day and my head is aching worse than it has in a while.

Another social media rant

The reason people love facebook and twitter is because it takes all the work out of getting to know people and forming relationships. You can create a sense of knowing someone by adding them on facebook or reading their tweets. But that is false knowledge.

Social media is relationships without work, and it's teaching society that we don't need to work within our relationships. That's a lie--relationships require hard work and deep care and selflessness.

The cutest thing I've ever seen! And I love this song!

Lately

Last night I couldn't go to sleep because I kept talking to myself. I seriously couldn't stop.

Here is a link to my pintrest. I don't use it much but I like the idea of pintrest because it's fun to have tasteful/pretty pictures all found in one place if I ever need some creative inspiration. http://pinterest.com/jaclynmarina/my-style-my-life-in-spice/

Is education a business? We need a revolution.

There is a crisis going on within the U.S. Higher Education system. Here's a mesh of a few of my thoughts--not aiming for anything special.

Students are not being challenged to think critically--or think at all. Youth of this generation have lost their ambition. I think it's plain that if this pattern continues the next generation of America will grow up uninformed about virtually everything. Many students sleepwalk through college and still graduate with a degree (another problem: the grade curve) and they do this having learned nothing. I did this. I know many others who did this.

Faculty is not motivated to care about the quality of their teaching mostly because of two problems: 1) tenure-a well-known issue 2) the faculty at most higher education institutions are not paid very well anymore, or are now only hired part time. This eventually has an effect on the quality of education that is being given as many professors are forced to juggle two or three part time jobs at the same time and because of this, have no sense of loyalty to their employer or students.

In 1972, the U.S. government implemented what is now known as the Federal Pell Grant in order to help low income students get off the street and lower the unemployment rate. When it began, the Pell Grant would pay over 95% of tuition towards a public education. Today I would say the Pell Grant covers maybe 25% of it.

Eventually, with economic recessions combined with bad politics, the government began leaning away from grants and more towards low-interest federal student loans. On top of that, it became a trend to cut education budgets first since educational institutions can actually create a revenue for themselves--by raising tuition and fees. This is a bad idea.

Problems only surmount. Particularly during the the economic recession of 2008 Americans began flocking back to school; especially in response to the rising unemployment rate. Such a explosion in enrollment for public schools made it difficult to accommodate everyone, because of their cut educational budgets. Many institutions were forced to cut faculty, hire part time, (which cuts down the number of classes offered) and alongside that, to increase tuition and fees. What were our students left with? They now have to pay more money, as they stay in school longer, and the longer they stay in school the more their interest accumulates on student debt.

Enter the latest craze: for profit trade schools. Many turn education into a business as they have discovered a new way to finance these institutions. (I'd be interested to know what the reader's opinion on this is:) Wall Street investors sell and buy shares of for profit schools. Is it ethical for education to be considered a business? Not to mention the insanely ridiculous price per credit hour for profits often charge. A program certificate, diploma, or degree at a for profit often costs twice the amount one would pay for an associates degree at a public school-- and for what is most often less quality of an education. These types of institutions prey on potential students by marketing quick programs to complete a degree in 9, 12, or 18 months; hands-on job experience; AND guaranteed career placement. What could be more enticing to an uninformed, first generation college seeking student, who doesn't really even like school? They are sold a product. They are sold education. These students sign papers to take out federal grants, loans, and then private loans, to finance the gap, and end up receiving a piece of paper that usually will not give them the kind of job they were promised. Nor help them pay any of those loans back.

All the while, Wall Street investors make millions as 10% of college students in the U.S. are enrolled in for profit schools, yet owe 50% of the federal student loan debt in America. (Not to mention private loan debt, which is nearly equal to the amount of U.S. credit card debt- $750 million.) So who funds these for profit schools like University of Phoenix, ITT Technical Institute, Devry University, (etc.) and essentially, their multi-billion dollar investors? That would be you and me, the taxpayers.
Don't even get me started on quality of education acquired from these for profit educators.

What can we expect from the future generations of this country if we grow up to be uneducated and in debt? Is this crisis unavoidable or can something be done?

Personally, I think that if I am to avoid the inevitable wreck these future generations may be headed into, the only answer is to rescue my ambition. I must learn to do what the past generations did: work hard at my job, be faithful, and read books & newspapers to educate myself.

Grow some curiosity. Grow some ambition.

Higher Education

Think about it:

A possible danger of online classes would be the fast-foodization of higher education where low cost, convenience, and the ease of finishing become values in themselves to the possible detriment of what can only be accomplished slowly and over time.

...We Americans want fast-food everything.

What a run will do

Although, my entire life I had hoped to be a nomad, I was not prepared for everything moving to a new city would hold. I came to Louisville with a blank slate. I didn't know anyone and no one knew who I truly was. There is nothing that excites me more than unlimited potential--I'm a optimist.

During my run today, I was struck with the thought that what I like to do most is busy my life with a little color. When I first moved to Louisville, I think I forgot who I was. I was caught up in potential. Today I remembered a little bit of who I am.

I like color
I like to create aesthetic experiences for other people
I like quirky things
I like to create
I like to write--it's the best way I can communicate, but I don't practice it as much as I should
I like to read--theology and literature, & not contemporary books, & I'm trying to get into history
I like to listen to NPR
I like music--all types are appropriate for different situations, except country, which is never appropriate
I like to cook--particularly out of Julia Child's French cookbook, it's like art
I like organic gardens
I like flowers
I like roadtrips--I am the master of planning roadtrips
I like to travel, especially international travel and I find myself mostly drawn to internationals rather than American friends
I like finding obscure places to hang out
I like people watching
I like challenges--although it may not seem like it, I do have a competitive spirit
I like to continually learn--above all this is most important to me
I like to run
I like to make new friends & follow up with them
I like to think about deep things, but I never keep it in my brain for long because I have difficulty focusing sometimes and unless something is written out before me it doesn't make a lot of sense in my head, so sometimes I get great thoughts that I need to write out but I don't make time to because my great thoughts usually come when I'm in the shower or about to fall asleep or out for a run
I like higher education
I like learning languages--but have had difficulty in the past with focus
I like change and newness

I write the above list not because I am expert in any of it, but because these things make me happy. I don't know a lot of things; I have little experience and even less knowledge. But I am excited to live this life because I trust that I will learn and grow. Learning and growing is the most exciting thing about life.

The reason you won't delete your facebook

** Whoops, currently being edited

Since the explosion of social media during the past few years, a particular question has unceasingly continued to cross my mind. Why is social media so popular and, dare I say, addictive? I've tried to make sense of it through my own personal reflection and experience. Since joining facebook around 7 years ago, I'd say that I've deleted my account a good 20 times--only to reinstate it, every time. And I know quite a few others who have done the same. So why can we count on sites like twitter, facebook, and blogspot to attract and (imprison) the online society? Please consider with me one possible conclusion.

Although at the moment I cannot find the exact quote that I am thinking of from John Piper's Desiring God, I'll never forget his point that our joy is multiplied when we are able to share experience with others. Consider the reason stories are told. If something particularly out of the ordinary happens during the day, a desire to share these happenings with another grows for the simple joy of hearing and sharing. A good story makes people happy--especially for the teller of the story. Joy is also had if there were a particular person who experienced that story with you, mutual bond is formed and can never die. (Memories.) Ultimately, my point is that joy is multiplied when people get to share their thoughts & experiences with others.

Secondly, upon reflection, I've decided that I think what people want most in life is to experience loving, self sacrificial care and engaging, thoughtful conversation with others. People desire community; God created them to desire it. People desire to share their experiences with other others; and they want them to care, self sacrificially.

My point? Society can be counted on to continue to post photos to facebook, update their twitter status, and describe their day on blogspot because they've found a way to share experiences with others. People want others to know "What they are thinking" or "What they are doing" because they want to have a voice, they want to be heard, they want to share and connect. Comments on a particular experience is a plus but whether others care or not--it's not an issue--once you hit "Publish," "Tweet," or "Post" the words are out there and available for others to read, and, ultimately, to care.

This is the reason social media has exploded. It has resonated with the deepest longings of the human heart--connection to other people, community.

The Church & community

"According to Paul, gospel partnership is the normal Christian life. It means standing together united in the gospel, determined to live as citizens of heaven in the midst of our corrupt generation, longing and striving to see the gospel be defended and proclaimed, and bravely copping the conflict, struggle and persecution that inevitably follow."

"Leaders, pastors and elders are responsible to teach, to warn, to rebuke, and to encourage. They are foremen and organizers, guardians and mobilizers, teachers and models. They provide the conditions under which the rest of the gospel partners can also get on with vine work--with prayerfully speaking God's truth to others."

-Marshall & Payne

The Church: prayerfully speaking God's truth to others, within a community of every day life. What a beautiful picture! I want to be a part of that. Develop a vision and make it happen.

Ano Nuevo

“Remember not the former things,
nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
and rivers in the desert.

(Isaiah 43:18-19 ESV)

Feliz Ano Nuevo

I have SO much to write...